I think that a lot of people don’t like Zesty Gourmand. This is due to the fact that she’s a ready-made, card-carrying one-off antagonist and she said some mean things about Pinkie’s hair and she wears her longcoat over her shoulders like a douchebag. And yet I am Frog, and what does Frog do if not love the characters that normal people casually hate? Acceptable answers include eating live fish, drawing web comics and lusting over Sensei. But away we go!

There are lots of things that Alsesta Grandeur doesn’t like. She sure as hell doesn’t like being called “Zesty Gourmand”. But all it took was one wanker who works for the papers to give her a ludicrous nickname, and that was that. Do you know the difference between a gourmet and a gourmand? Zesty does, and she profoundly resents the implications. She furthermore dislikes people who can’t comprehend the nuances of fine food, which is very nearly everypony. And she really-super dislikes all those elitist filly bitches from her school days who constantly tormented her for being a sickly, homely muleicorn (which she is; Daddy Grandeur was a donkey, hence the disproportionately big ears and massive hybrid horn). To put it ever so constructively, Zesty’s ugly childhood left a permanently bad taste in her mouth.

But things ain’t all bad, of course, and there are aspects of life that Alsesta appreciates a lot. Certainly she likes cuisine done right; her weak constitution and oversensitive palette have granted her the benefit of sussing out the purest food known to ponykind. She likes her rescue dog/kindred spirit Anton, one of the only individuals alive who really gets her. For the most part she likes her twin brother, Dandelion “Dandy” Grandeur, who has always been protective and supportive of his darling “baby” sister (she’s only the tiniest bit jealous of the fact that his muleicorn features are not nearly as blatant as hers). And lo and behold, Zesty REALLY likes that bizarrely flamboyant, possibly psychotic old scar-faced crone, Franzbrötchen. Life was so much easier when these two very type-A mares were enemies, and then frenemies, and then even just friends…but lovers? Zesty was perfectly content to be alone all her life and was most certainly not planning on falling in love. Then again, neither was Franzbrötchen…

Fun froggy fact: Liz and I surmised that Canterlot pones wear hoofies with actual (removable) horseshoes attached, since they walk around on cobblestone all day. Wear such hoofies in a dirt/asphalt-heavy town like Ponyville or Manehattan, and everypony’s going to think you’re some kind of prissy tenderfoot.