Consort, we have an appetency for thy maypole. Vouchsafe the magirist a doit so that we might withsake this victualling-house and proceed amain to mine bedchamber. Whereupon thou shalt perform commixtion to Our callipygian bodie.

(Please understand that for ponies of her generation, a mare showing her exposed hooves is seen as unthinkably lewd.)

||(If this description is too racy for "safe" (and boy is it ever racy), feel free to tag the image as suggestive. I'm not in the mindset to ponder the relationship between pictures and their descriptions vis-à-vis rating tags.)||