YOU: Oh, sorry, Derpy, I didn’t know anypony was…in…here…{don’tstareatherfeetdon’tstareatherfeetdon’tstareatherfeet}

DERPY: Wh-why are you staring at my feet??

YOU: {Crap.} Uh, I-I wasn’t…

DERPY: Oh no, you…you think they’re ugly!

YOU: I…I WHAT?!

DERPY: {tearing up} I HATE them! I HATE my big, stupid, ugly feet and how I’m always tripping over them!

YOU: Derpy…

DERPY: They’re big and stupid and probably smell! They’re gross and I don’t—

{You suddenly grab Derpy’s ankle, bring one of her feet up to your face and kiss her tenderly on the ball of the foot}

DERPY: {speechless} …you…

YOU: I love them, Derpy. I love your big, warm, soft, lovely feet. They are just as beautiful to me as any other part of you.

DERPY: You…you don’t…?

YOU: Would you like me to wash them?

DERPY: {beet red} …y-yes, please…

{You give Derpy a tender smile}

YOU: You are beautiful, Derpy. Don’t you EVER think otherwise. {You kiss her foot again multiple times, from her heel to her toes}

DERPY: <3