Page 1090 – Alternate Absurdity

This schtick is harder to write than I anticipated. I either need to watch more classic action movies, or… fewer.

SFX: (POP! POP! POP! POP!)

Discord GM: Hello again! And congratulations – you’ve found another one of your party members!

DM: …You are drawn by the sounds of many balloons magically popping. By the time you arrive, the clearing is… well, clear.

SFX: (POP! POP!)

Discord GM: Clear except for one adorable pink pony.

Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie Pie! Oh thank goodness. I could really use some laughs right now.

Applejack: Mah company ain’t good enough?

Twilight Sparkle: Not when you give me a headache, Applejack.

Applejack: That’s… UN-fair…

Twilight Sparkle: Anyway, I need data, any data! What did Discord subject you to? Did he have your Element of Harmony? What’s with the serious face? Did something bad happen? Whatever it is, don’t worry. We’ll get through it together.

Pinkie Pie: There’s only two things you need to know, Commander Sparkle.

Twilight Sparkle: What the…

Pinkie Pie: First, this pony’s all run out of the pink bubblegum in her soul. And second… Discord better check his watch, because he just made it GO TIME. Let’s MOVE OUT!

Applejack: … That looks like fun.

Pinkie Pie: There’s NO TIME for FUN.

Twilight Sparkle: Well, I guess we’re two for two…

Applejack: Two of what?

Twilight Sparkle: Come on! Ponies acting weird after getting one-on-one time with Discord.

Applejack: Now, Ah think yer overreactin’. Maybe it’s stress. Maybe goin’ up against a demigod tryin’ to rule over Equestria can make even Pinkie Pie take things seriously.

(beat)

Twilight Sparkle: But… why… Oh, nevermind.

DM: Can we discuss for a second?

Discord GM: As soon as I’m done savoring this.